8 Things I'm Learning this Winter 2023

1. It's okay to amend your plan. 

Your timeline. Your intricately planned out plan. 

It's okay to move and shift things around. 

You won't be the same every single day. Your body will change. Your interests will change. Your moods will change. What bothered you one day won't bother you as much the next. It's okay to flow and adapt as you change and as life changes around you. 

You are allowed to change your mind. Things do not have to be fixed. You are allowed to evolve.

 2. "Show up as yourself."

- Luvvie Jones

Being who we are is easier than being who we are not.

Life feels lighter and freer when we get to be our true selves, show up as our real selves, and be accepted for who we truly are.

Enough with the masks. 

3. I can do everything the “right” way and still might not get the outcome that I was hoping for. 

Things might not happen according to the way I wanted them to. Even if I did everything “right”. Even if I did all the right things. Even if I followed all the rules. Even if I adhered to the agreed upon routine, the protocol.

That’s not how life works.

Sometimes, you can do all the "right" things, and life still goes completely the opposite of how you hoped it would. 

Growth is being able to accept this truth about life, yet still keep on moving forward. It's a never ending lifelong journey, that's for sure. 

 4. The present is not a past in power. 

It is a moment of choice and decision. The past was not meant to be a life sentence. It does not define you. However, in some cases, it can be a lesson to learn from.   

We are not in 2022 anymore. 

Just because it happened that way in the past or the previous time, does not necessarily mean it will happen that way in the future. You’re forgetting how you’ve changed and grown, how the world around you also has changed. 

We're now in 2023. Leave the past in the past, but don't forget how it has shaped you into the person you are today. 

5. Sunlight and a short walk is powerful.

6. Your emotions are trying to tell you something. 

Sometimes, they are there to move you to action. 

7. Female friendships are a gift.

Yes, and amen. 

8. I really like Cathy Park Hong’s book Minor Feelings: An Asian American Reckoning. 

I love her directness, her honesty, and her unabashed intent to write to an Asian audience. I was surprised that she got to the point so quickly, but I later realized that I was drawn to that very aspect of her writing.

I had initially heard of Minor Feelings I think back in 2021 from an Instagram post where someone quoted from the book and I saved the post. It was something about how working harder doesn't get us the seat at the table or visibility. As Asian Americans, we're often invisible, and I like how Hong points that out and states so poetically what many of us haven't yet found the words to say about our experience in America. 

I've realized that I respect writers who aren't afraid to get into topics of racism, class differences, and reckoning with our nation's past. How did I not start reading this book sooner?